Wednesday Mini-Meltdown

Ahhhh now that was a nice morning.  You know when sometimes things just all come together and you end up feeling rather supported and whole again?  This week has been wearing me down to the bones.  Well, hah, month/year, really.  Work is impossible and continues to get more impossible as the days go by.  I’ve adopted a new stance after going’s on over the last week where one boss hammered me into building an entire website while the other left me pretty much alone, thinking she was helping me resolve the overflow of workload to let me catch up.  I don’t like to play one against the other but by the end of it all I had an entire website created and populated with dozens of policies, procedures, guidelines, medical directives, staff resources, order sets, directories and pager listings galore.  I had all the teams split and reporting payroll and vacation time weekly….there were some excel formulas so complicated I’m not sure I could even repeat them, but fuck it, there it is….you can now enter your shift and my spread sheet will auto-calculate your hours, unpaid breaks, flex time, benefit hours, patient workload, attendance ratio, treatment ratio, service and non-service time percentage and will even tell you the time frame you have left to take your accumulated stat holiday banked hours, paid and non-paid vacation, and accumulated flex time.  There’s a nice rolling total too which will help when I have to pick through the finances at the end of each month.


It took overtime hours to get that up, for which I will not be paid as I have maxed out my flex time bank again.  Whatever though, it was worth it to get her off my back about it…..or so I thought.  The very day it went live (after she fucking deleted all my fucking files that were originally linked to redirects on the website effectively making half the shit up there not work) she sat down in my office to nitpick over the font I had chosen for the staff directory.  Haha…soooo whatever.  It was up, it was current and all documents were up to date, reformatted into better shape and it looked good too.  After that, she wrote out her announcement to the staff about how we were finally able to launch (she actually wrote “finally” in her announcement…(sigh)) and then called me to ask me to do something specific when, after the mention of a meeting came up, she decided to take the opportunity to remind me of the other meetings she’d asked for that I hadn’t yet booked, like her meeting with a small set of staff over at the other campus that she has quarterly.  ???  Seriously?  There’s a secretary over there who knows the staff’s schedules and does NOTHING all day but, after taking up my entire weekend and week with her stupid, redundant website (all the info I put up there is already out there available to staff on our shared drive.  It’s just that most of the staff don’t know how to click on the fucking S in the drive list to find what they need.  Yes, I’m serious.  I had to gather all that info to make it ‘easier’ for the staff to find) she wants to start picking at me about a staff meeting she’s been waiting a month for me to book????  I’ve SEEN her make her own meetings many times….why she’s just left this one floating so she can bother me about it is beyond comprehension.

So, the other boss, now realizing that my free time that she’s given me by taking on more work herself has been eaten up by the first boss, is now on me to get all of her stuff done.  As I was struggling yesterday to get that done, plus stats audits and the rest of my too-goddamn-busy job, the first one comes in and asks me about what we will do over this period of time where the part time secretary role at the other campus is being covered.  You see, part-time-do-nothing secretary has found herself a new job out of sheer boredom, I’m sure, and now there’s a vacancy.  The boss decided to take my casual, who is the only reason I get payroll and stats audits done each month, and have her fill in there, making her totally unavailable to come help me.  This will go on until May because the boss is taking two weeks’ vacation at the end of April and can’t interview people.  (I’m tempted to apply.  Seriously.  If I can find another part time job and keep my benefits and pension I’m doing it.)  So, not only will the girls here and I not get vacation this summer unless I am willing to cover them at registration (cries…no one covers me..), I can’t get any help while the casual sits across town doing nothing.  THEN….oh then….the boss comes to me yesterday.

“Uh Grainne?  Oh…hahaha…look at this.  You’ve closed and locked your office door like we told you to and here I am walking right in anyway.  Sorry.  I’m sorry.”

(I had closed my door in the morning but the two of them just kept coming in so I locked it in the afternoon.  They started bringing their keys after that.)

“So..Grainne.  I’m sorry…I know you’re really busy but with *secretary* gone and *casual* covering, I have some access requests I need to get done before the next set of students start.  Can you do those for me?  Today?  I did one but now I can’t find the form anymore.”

The online form.  She can’t find the online form she found only moments before to do the first one and….okay.  Whatever.  I contemplated getting the casual access to the management side of the network but the hassle involved would take longer than doing the fucking thing myself, so, I did all the necessary paperwork to get the students cleared to work in the hospital.

“*Boss?”  I tried to ask in a friendly tone.  “Do you think it a good idea to get *casual* ordering access for the other site – just so she can take care of equipment and supplies without having to go through me while she’s covering?”

“Oh, well.  We’re pretty lucky that she’s agreed to cover the hours.  I don’t want to take advantage of her.”

My jaw literally dropped.  WHAT?  THE?  FUCK?!!  You don’t want to take advantage of HER?  What the hell makes that your go-to when all you do is take advantage of me???  So you’ll put all that additional work on my over-full plate just so the casual doesn’t feel taken advantage of?  Holy hannah….  I nearly hit her.

*Breathes iiiiiiiiiin Breathes ouuuuuuuuut*

It’s now Wednesday and I’ve not started payroll that closes Friday morning.  I closed my door upon arrival and posted a sign that said:  “If you’d like to get paid, please do not disturb”  lolol.  It works like a charm for the staff.  The bosses….not so much.  They’re both in meeting now though so I’m taking the moment to vent my frustrations.

Oh, the good part!  Back to the beginning of this post 🙂  I had three staff members stop in to say hello to me this morning and all three came to see how I was doing and to ask how things were going.  I don’t complain to many here….I’m not stupid enough to put my job in jeopardy….but these guys can see I’m struggling.  Two came in because they were worried aggressive-boss was mad at them for something.  One was near tears when she told me about how the boss had yelled at her because she titled a vacation request email “vacation request”.  The boss wanted it to be called “Time off request” (only because that’s what she happened to search at the time when she got caught with her pants down and likely told the other managers that the staff member had made no such request and went to prove it by searching her email). There was an email war that waged for a few days, back and forth.  I shared my story about how we recently had a 25 minute argument over the name of a file that’s been called the same thing for the last five years and the staff member felt better.

Talking to the three of them, two of whom made me laugh so hard I nearly choked on my coffee several times (I adore these people) and one who had an even worse story about the boss than I have ever heard….she’s so unprofessional, aggressive-boss.  She said the most outrageous things to her staff all the time.  After they left I felt better…lighter.  I’m human I guess; I like knowing I’m not alone in things and that the nasty behaviour isn’t only directed at me.  Several insist on calling it ‘abuse’ and I can’t go there.  I’ve know the angrier sort in my life and although my ways of coping with this are definitely linked to my past experiences, it’s really just a shitty work environment.  The huge department filled with amazing people who all work under this shitty umbrella, like me, make it worth it enough to deal as long as I can.  Both of them are nearing 60 anyway.  They won’t be here forever and my career will well outlive theirs.

Now that I’ve had the ‘pleasure’ of working for two asshole doctors who screamed profanity at me on the phone, a director who eliminated my job because I was sick, two horrible bully secretaries who made me cry every day (when I first started here nearly 15 years ago) and now, two deranged, miserable women who get a kick out of being in charge, I can take just about anything.  I even had a manager who once did nothing but stare directly at my chest every time he spoke to me.  Every time.  No wavering. I called attention to it and he started avoiding me in every way he could.  Happily, I managed to get myself out of there before anything got worse.

Ah.  Workplaces.

Now.  Onto to pay a hundred people so they don’t all turn on me when their mortgage payments come due.


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About Grainne

My name is Grainne. This blog has been with me for years now and has served as a journal, a confessional, an outlet and a place for me to create and express my love of life. Thank you for stopping by and for becoming a part of this life long journey of mine. I appreciate every single one of you who takes the time to do so. :)

2 responses to “Wednesday Mini-Meltdown”

  1. KittyHere says :

    And the world keeps turning. You are so right to handle payroll first.

  2. The Sound of Ed's Voice says :

    People… People are so miserable and just love taking it out on others.

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