Oh great. Just what I needed.
Some asshat who was selling clothes outside the cafeteria today told me, flat out, that my ass was too big to fit nicely into his clothes. I mean, he didn’t say it in a cruel way and I know I have a big arse, it’s attached to the back of me for crying out loud, but he didn’t have to say it like that. It’s a freaking hospital, mid-day, outside the cafeteria that is teeming with people and staff and he says in a voice far louder than necessary, the my rear end was TOO BIG to fit into his crappy fashion forward clothes. He even pulled out different style and pointed out the flap of fabric that would cover my generous ass, and suggested it I try it on…just to see what he meant.
I came away feeling lucky that no one asked if I was pregnant. I just lost 20 pounds. I was *just* feeling like I might be able to get away with some slightly more fitted clothes. Sigh. Apparently not so much.
I do have a booty. I’ve always had one but when I was a stick figure it was lovely. Now it’s just big. (A wonderfully kind nurse I used to work with was there looking at clothes and looked up in horror when she heard him announce my proportional issues. She told me people are paying to get implants to make their butt look like mine. I’m going to buy her a coffee tomorrow and take it to her on shift.)
So the battle between accepting my body for what it is and mourning what it was continues. I’m currently drowning the thoughts with wine. Stupid round ass. Ah well at least I have a portable cushion right? (Fml)