The good. 

So, I’m hiding in my bedroom waiting for the landlord to come in and invade my privacy.  We called, okay Dayne called, and he was polite.  He left a message telling her she could come by tonight to start her measurements and she could do the rest this weekend. She hasn’t called back or come by. *sigh*! We played this game yesterday too. Dayne, although frustrated, is awesome at this stuff and is being very supportive and sweet. He’s going to tell her I’m ill so she doesn’t come bug me while she pokes and prods through my stuff. I’m so thankful for this man right now. 

Colt is being amazing too. He’s doing such a great job at school and the last few meetings have been so encouraging and supportive. It’s made such a difference, all the changes we made like giving him one day a week off from school, plus whatever other bits and pieces filtered through to help him come to the conclusion that being kind to people was the better way to go. He is working so hard and I’m so proud of him. We both are. They gave him an award in front of the school for being so appreciative of the things people do for him. He’s such a sweetheart and to know he’s sharing that side of him again makes me smile with my entire being. I knew he wasn’t lost. I was terrified he was heading that way but I knew my sweet, wonderful, kind hearted boy was still in there. I tell him how proud I am as many times a day as he will listen. 

We were offered a placement at the ASD program through the school board that I think I have mentioned on here before. We weren’t sure that this was a good to hear to destabilize his social life, but preparing for high school is becoming important. The program helps kids on the autism spectrum and to learn how to study and work independently, which is something most autistic children struggle with. We were not surprised he was offered the placement since it was applied for when he was struggling with his behavior and wasn’t learning anything, but now that this huge turnaround has happened, the less sure it was a good thing this year. Of course having to move house was a surprise to us and after careful consideration we decided to decline the placement this year and reapply for his grade 7 year when it will really count the most anyway. We were quite worried about with the School would think. They had scheduled a meeting for us last week and although I knew it was very important to go I was buried under so much work in my office, so far behind, I just couldn’t take the afternoon. I offered to reschedule but we didn’t have very long to make our decision and I wanted them to have as much time to plan as possible.  In the end I wrote an email to the group explaining about the move and how we could reach her decision and Dayne decided to go to the meeting on his own. I won’t say I wasn’t dreading the outcome but, much to my surprise, he was amazing. He actually took the opportunity to open up to the team and explained with patients and passion what was going on in our lives. Now he is a bit of a manly man and he does not emotions overtake him easily or often but when it comes to his son he is often a bit of a wreck when talking about the hard stuff. Of course, the moment his voice cracked with tears in the room full of women were almost desperate to comfort him. I know at the heart of it they were able to see the same sweet vulnerability in Dayne that they are so used to seeing in Colt and fell  all over themselves trying to make it better. In the end it was the most successful meeting with ever had with the school. I received email from three of the participants letting me know how much they appreciated the fact that he came on his own and that he was so open, honest,and emotionally available for them. They said that they completely understood and respected our decision on the placement and offered to do what they could to help prepare Colt for our upcoming move. The very best part was that they went out of their way to let us know that we can count on their support. 

Dayne was somewhat mortified after the meeting, and called me embarrassed beyond belief, but I thanked him, and loved him, and told him he had done such a good job being so open with people he didn’t trust for the good of our son. When I put it that way he felt a little better. :-). So now the school is planning for Colt’s next year and the stress is over for now. That stress, at least.

I could not be prouder of the two of them and I could not be luckier to have them in my life. I feel so grateful to have been given a second chance with this little family of mine. 

Anyway, that’s the news for now. If I can get through these weeks with my rotten landlord making my life awkward and uncomfortable, and if I can get through work being impossible an exhausting, and if I can make my body function while I pack and move and pack and move and pack and move, I will find solid ground again. I am looking forward to that moment. 

Wish me luck. 

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About Grainne

My name is Grainne. This blog has been with me for years now and has served as a journal, a confessional, an outlet and a place for me to create and express my love of life. Thank you for stopping by and for becoming a part of this life long journey of mine. I appreciate every single one of you who takes the time to do so. :)

10 responses to “The good. ”

  1. KittyHere says :

    Wishing you lots of luck!

  2. myambivalentexistence says :

    Good luck !!!! One foot in front of the other !

  3. Birdie says :

    I totally don’t mean this to sound trite but remember, this too shall pass. Take a big breath. Breathe. You will be in your new home soon.

    • Grainne says :

      Thank you Birdie xo It’s not trite…it’s very true and I’m trying so hard to cling to the good things in my life right now and not let the bad over take me.

  4. The Sound of Ed's Voice says :

    Biggest wishes of luck!!! It’s an exciting adventure!! I’m so glad your little family is getting what it absolutely deserves!!!

    • Grainne says :

      We’re so exited to get out of the place we are in now too, thank you so much! It’s always felt so unsafe there…so exposing, but I just figured it was my own issues causing it and not the nasty landlord. Thank you for the support 🙂 I’m so glad we found each other in blog land. xx

  5. paindepression says :

    I wish all the luck, love and happiness in the world. You deserve it!

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