Ha! I finally managed to figure out where the cursing influence came from with Colt. He vanished upstairs when we got home after I asked him to lower his voice as he rattled on, announcing his every thought as if they were memorized lines from a movie. I’m used to him constantly thinking aloud and generally it doesn’t even distract me. We will sit here and have the tv going, a movie on his iPad playing, a game on his iPod, and whatever D is doing making noise on his end of the room, and Colt will be talking away all the while. I can even read in the midst of that din, but, as he gets louder it gets a bit much. I ask him to lower his voice and he just retreats to his bedroom so he can be as loud as he wants. I feel bad making him feel like he has to leave the room but he needs to learn some social boundaries there, plus, I hate being snappy with him and all that noise can be awfully irritating after long days at work with pain in tow.
Anyway, up to his room he went and I kind of half heard him turn all his things on (I think he does it it white noise out the rest of the stimulus so he can unwind) but something kept catching my ear.
“Mumble mumble hate that asshole kid….something something ass wipe”.
What the? Then it stopped. Not ten minutes later …
“That is such a fucking joke! You stupid, ugly scrotum. I’m gonna call you scroat from now on. Dick breath.”
And that was more than enough.
“Colt (insert full first and last name here)! Get down here this minute and bring your iPad now!”
He’s been watching some idiot on YouTube who has recorded Super Mario Brothers on his computer and then provided some colourful language to… What? Look like an idiot. It’s a teenaged boy so nothing too out of character. I can understand why Colt thinks it’s cool…I was a stupid teenager once too, as we all were, but what Colt misses is the social rules and impulse control most teens are able to access. It keeps them from telling their principal to “suck my balls” at the very least. Sigh. This is not going to be an easy age is it?
I’m glad to have found a source though. When I don’t know where an influence is coming from I have zero chance to manipulate the information in a way Colt can conceptualize. Being able to clearly show him where he is missing something is so helpful. For instance, if it was kids on the school yard who we’re yelling these things at the top of their lungs I’d never be able to make him believe it’s not allowed or wrong. When the evidence is right before his eyes words are not going to work. Having it isolated to YouTube allows me to draw a clear comparison between the kids at school who do not get suspended for doing this and the idiot on YouTube who is just sounding off because he thinks it’s cool. Mind you, me disliking the guy makes Colt like him even more, but that is something I can cope with. In don’t know many kids his age who don’t act that way.
I never wanted it put Colt in a situation where he’s having to act differently than the rest of the people in his world, nor do I encourage him being like everyone else, but in these things I kind of have to. I find it impossible to convince him that social rules matter without comparison to other kids. I don’t think I’m in the wrong there but it’s a grey area for sure. I guess all I can do is the same as any other parent….learn as I go right?
Hope everyone has a great weekend 🙂