Whining and Complaining. Pain again. Nothing new or interesting….*sigh*

Oh guys.  Things are bad inside my body right now.  I’m not sure exactly what to do with this.  My back is hurting so much I can’t function….it’s just usually a much different set of pains that are working against me, but his is flat-out agony.

I went to the bathroom this morning (hiya Tooooo Much Info about to hit you here) and when I went to wipe I found myself unable to turn my body to accomplish it.  I couldn’t reach behind my own rear end to clean myself…what the hell do I do with that?  I ended up just jumping into the shower…but really.  Can I call D for help with that?  I’m pretty sure he wasn’t planning on wiping my ass for a few more years yet, if anything.  It’s not even like I could benefit from baby wipes or something to make it easier, I just can’t fucking reach … can’t move in that direction.

Now THAT is a bit much to deal with.

Every part of the fucking thing hurts.  It hurts to breathe, to sit, to lie down, to stand, to cough (holy crap is that ever an experience in explosive pain).  I showered under scalding hot water trying to release the muscles some but I think it was a bad idea as I ended up making the actual spine feel unsupported which made it all hurt more.

I can’t reach above my head.  I can’t hold my hands to my face so can’t even apply make up or brush my hair.  I have to breathe shallowly to stop myself from constantly cringing and gritting my teeth (which hurt, and my jaw and face are on board as well, of course).

This is easily the most pain I’ve been in for ever.  Clear 8/10 and I’ve doubled all my pain meds, took three muscle relaxers (to my usual one) and had a handful of Advil just incase there’s some inflammation going on.  That was all an hour ago so this is the best I’m gonna get.

Must make appointment to see my doc.  It’s hard enough living like I was…this?  This is fucking insane.  😦   Thankfully it’s Sunday and I don’t have to do anything but laundry and my boys are helping so much this weekend.  I didn’t even tell them but they know.  I feel so lucky to have them with me.

Back to sleep for a while I guess.  Slept all day yesterday, all night last night.  Might as well carry on until tomorrow eh?  *sigh*


About Grainne

My name is Grainne. This blog has been with me for years now and has served as a journal, a confessional, an outlet and a place for me to create and express my love of life. Thank you for stopping by and for becoming a part of this life long journey of mine. I appreciate every single one of you who takes the time to do so. :)

14 responses to “Whining and Complaining. Pain again. Nothing new or interesting….*sigh*”

  1. KittyHere says :

    Sorry you are hurting so badly. I guess a trip to the ER would not get you anywhere. But if it would I say go.

    • Grainne says :

      I think of that at times myself but they will just dose me with IV pain meds and send me on my way. Chronic pain, especially back pain, seems to be scoffed upon where I work. It’s sad to admit but unfortunately true.

      I’m about to try a super hot bath with Epsom salts then I’ll ice my neck (which swells and causes a huge headache after a hot bath). Hoping that will help.

      Thanks for the love Kitty. Xox

      • KittyHere says :

        Epsom salts — I am glad you mentioned that. The orthopedist mentioned using Epson salts for soaking my hands. I had forgotten. Now they are on the shopping list.

      • Grainne says :

        When I smashed my toe last month and had all that terrible bruising I soaked my feet in warm water with epsom salts for three nights in a row. My foot turned back to a normal colour within those three days (I usually bruise for a long time, deeply) and the swelling went right down. FIgured it couldn’t hurt soaking my whole body in it. lol. Nightly.

  2. paindepression says :

    Hang in there. What you described reminds me of when I wrenched a muscle in my back. I couldn’t wipe myself and I was in a load of pain for several days. I wonder what is going on in your body!?!?

    • Grainne says :

      I have a lot of half-answers from the docs I’ve seen. At this point, my GP says that it’s all the messed up parts of my spine affecting root nerves (just about anywhere in my body since my entire spine is affected by degeneration, herniated and bulging discs). It’s weird that my actual spine hurts to touch though…the bones ache and feel bruised. I don’t even know what to do anymore. I’m going to see my doc later this week…

      Thanks for the love xox We need to catch up. I’ve been moping and sleeping so much lately. xo

  3. Mental Mama says :

    I hope it’s gotten better since you posted. I’ve been having some trouble with my left shoulder today, which is odd. Hopefully things ease up for you soon. Sending gentle hugs.

    • Grainne says :

      Thanks love. Hope your shoulder is okay this morning too. When I woke this morning the pain and tension had come down a little. I’m hoping it keeps going…will just keep getting up and stay active today and hopefully will work it out of my system. Will be seeing my doc this week anyway…will run it by her and see what happens. xox

  4. Pete says :

    Oh shit, why do we have to put up with this? An 8/10 is horrible and I felt for you so much, sending as much love and care as I can darling twin! “PainDepression” sounds right when saying it could be on top of everything else a wrenched back muscle. That cam leave you breathless and in agony. But if it’s your usual pain but turned up higher you have to get to your Dr Grainne, you should anyway. I’d love to go with you (take some pressure of D and C for a while) and see your Dr with you. Take care my precious twin.
    Humour helps I suppose a little so here goes:

    There once was a man from Australia
    Who painted his arse like a dahlia
    The colours were true, a red, white and blue
    But the smell was a hell of a failure

    Love you kiddo,

    Pete xo

    • Grainne says :

      *giggles* Thanks for the lymric there Pete. (Lymrick?) hmm..can’t spell yet, it’s only 9am.

      xox Hope today is a good one for you. Is it getting cooler out your way yet? We’re actually starting to see signs of spring this way.

    • Grainne says :

      Oh and I’d love to take you to an appt with me! That would be too funny…we’d be answering her questions in unison I think.

      • Pete says :

        Yeah it would be like that, same nerve pain, meds, attitude and like real twins answering at the same time. She be like “How is this possible?” OMG please don’t join my practise (haha). One of you is quite enough! Fuck it then we’d share meds, go to the park with champagne, picnic food, feel complete in ‘some way I guess’ and then I’d take you to the most stupid movie on just so we could piss ourselves laughing! (Hopefully not literally though). How can I miss someone I’ve never met??
        It is a bit of an Indian Summer here and although it is getting slightly colder it is still nice and mild.

        Love You Kiddo,

        Pete xo

      • Grainne says :

        LMAO! I can just see the doc’s face. “Noooo! God no!” I’ll take one of you and you can share the medical attention.”

        Mind you, we’d likely pay for their children’s weddings and University educations.


      • Pete says :

        Yes I’ll see ONE of you and DOULBE whatever the treatment is, drugs etc, but I shall ‘slyly’ charge for two of you since you’re so much the same, except I’m NOT giving your twin menopausal drugs lol!! Oh yes and that will help nicely pay for my children’s weddings and Uni bills, but I’ll see ONE of you at a time because otherwise it will blow my mind…..ahhh I love you kid sister, so much 🙂
        Our humour is the same….jet black! Beautiful!

        All my love,

        Pete xo

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